Go and have s3x – Zambian Court Tells Couple

A court in Zambia has sent a couple to go and turn their matrimonial bedroom upside-down with love making.

The court observed that horizontal refreshments were the bedrock of any marriage and therefore partners must be available to quench the thirst of their spouses at any time.

Early last month, Namate Sanyemba of Mazabuka’s Messenger Compound was in court seeking to end his three-year marriage to Nalishebo Akapelwa crying that his rod was gathering rust because his wife was not available for any action under the sheets.

Sanyemba also complained that his wife was in the habit of hauling insults at him sometimes even publicly whenever they had a misunderstanding.

But Nalishebo rebutted the accusation saying it was in fact her own cave of delight that was gathering cobwebs because her husband had been refusing to enter it.

She said said her husband had even drawn a demarcation on their matrimonial bed and ordered her not to cross on his side.

“He sometimes comes past midnight at home and when you try to ask where he was he shouts at me and sometimes even beats me,” Nalishebo told the court.

After noticing that the sexual drought in their three-year marriage was not a result of climate change but human misunderstanding, the court advised the couple to go and reflect about whether they really wanted their marriage to work or not.

The couple returned to the court on Wednesday and told Magistrate Regent Zunda that they were ready to give their marriage a chance.

Magistrate then went on to guide couple that bedroom gymnastics were the foundation of marriage saying other chores such as sweeping and cooking were secondary.

He urged the couple to return romance and intimacy to their bedroom and make sure each of them were satisfied for without proper action under the sheets, a marriage was doomed for failure.

By Angela Nambeye

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